I just read two posts by two of my favorite bloggers, each of them were struggling with the same thing I’m struggling with…we’re military wives. [Handling with Grace - Rambling and Struggling] // [Displaced Hoosier Hospitality - Getting Real] (If you get a chance go over and send them some love.)
I love my life and I’m madly in love with my husband, but I’m frustrated. You know my three best friends from Portland? One of them is getting married and is thinking about buying a house in the next couple years. One of them is currently looking at houses and has an adorable little girl. One of them recently had a baby and she bought a beautiful house. If we were playing the board game Life I’d be losing horribly.
Please don’t get me wrong, I’m incredibly grateful for the life that I’m living. My husband and I have done some amazing things and have so much fun together. It’s just…I’m turning 28 in June and we’ll be married for 4 years this year. I’m ready for the baby and the house. My husband is ready for the baby (his baby fever is almost worse than mine), but he’s not ready for the house. Meaning: he’s not ready to give up being a nomad and traveler. He loves that we get to move around. He loves that the military sends him all over the place for TDY’s. I love that about him. I love that he has that sense of adventure within him.
Everyone knows we’re leaving Italy next year. Plus his contract will be ending right around the same time. So you know we’re getting all the questions. “Where are you going next?” “Are you reenlisting?” “What are you going to do?”
We. Don’t. Know.
I hate saying that. It’s getting harder and harder for me to say that breezily with a “come what may” attitude. I want my husband to make a decision. I have a say but ultimately it’s his choice to make. He knows what I want and how I feel and he’s thinking on it. I’m trying not to push him. I’m trying to be supportive and understanding. BUT I WANT AN ANSWER OUT OF HIM! I need to start preparing myself now emotionally and mentally for whatever he chooses. It’ll take me a little time, but I’ll eventually be okay with whatever he chooses…as long as he gives me time to absorb it and think on it.
Okay. That’s off my chest. Shake it off. I’m going to distract myself with planning what we’re going to do this weekend. It’s supposed to be sunny and I don't want to waste it. I’m thinking Bled will be especially beautiful to visit again. OR there’s still some Carnevale celebrations going on in some nearby towns. That could be fun!